BDSM can be funny, and sweet and passionate. As regular readers of this site will be aware, I’m not generally a ‘suck it bitch’ kind of master. I prefer to work over boys with patience and humour – but don’t try and test me or I’ll will very calmly hurt you until you obey (or use the safeword). Don’t mistake my humour as an indication I won’t spank you very hard and methodically if required.

The following events have amused me in recent times….

Puppy Play Goes Too Far
While filming a scene in an outdoor spa in someone’s home their pet dog decided to check out the action and wandered into shot. This home is regularly used for fisting parties, so I’m sure it wasn’t anything the puppy hadn’t seen before. It looked curiously at the action for about a minute before it got bored and wandered off – probably thinking “how come that bitch gets a better collar than I do?”

Winning the Lottery
Sissyboy loves hearing about Fickstutenmarkt (Horse Fair) in Berlin. I told him that if I won the lottery I would take him to Germany and watch him get used at the party. When there was a jackpot lottery first price for $30M I told him that if I won, I would bring Fickstutenmarkt to Australia. We imagined the boarding announcement would be something like this:
“Good morning gentleman, would like to welcome all Fickstutenmarkt tops travelling to Melbourne, Australia to gang fuck Sissyboy. If you have an “A” on your boarding pass, please proceed to gate 3 where your 747 is boarding. If you have a ‘B” on your boarding pass, please proceed to gate 5 where your 747 is boarding. If you have a “C” on your boarding pass, please proceed to gate 7 where your 747 is also boarding. All three aircraft will be landing in Melbourne in approximately 23 hours, after a brief transit of Singapore.  We remind all people that gay sex is illegal in Singapore, so you should please refrain from fucking or sucking from touchdown in Singapore until we have cleared their airspace. We ask all tops to ensure they are ready to gangbang Sissyboy at the big orgy upon arrival in Australia.” 
But until that big lottery win arrives, if you want to help gang fuck sissyboy in Melbourne,  let me know.  🙂

On the weekend, I was at a party where there was a guy in the sling who was being fisted in front of three other guys, when he groaned “fuck” as his ass was stretched. One of the other boys, who is a perfect gentleman, looked him straight in the eye, and reproachfully said “language!”.  We all cracked up laughing. Hil-arious. If there was ever a time to swear its when you have a fist up your ass.

I’m not a size queen, but most of my partners are
One of the problems with being hung is that people often fall in love with the size of your massive cock. I had one guy who I still play regularly with once tell me that when he met me it was “Love at first suck”.  I’d prefer to inspire love and lust with my pants on, but if I have to wave my shlong around, then I guess, if you got it, flaunt it.