A very funny comedienne once said that one of the least romantic things to have in your bedroom is a glowing digital clock. She said that it means that you can work out exactly how long the sex lasted –  and that most people would much rather be left their illusions. If it felt like it went for ages then you don’t need to know it was only three minutes. She pointed out that even in the height of passion, most people can still subtract – especially when three of the numbers on the clock haven’t changed.

Filming sex means that you can find out from the time code exactly how long it went. I’ve always liked really long sessions and to an extent the video almost becomes a bit of a score card.  Also means you can’t lie.

I had a recent realisation that maybe I have sex for too long. It doesn’t exactly sound like a problem does it? But I’ve realised that I tend to undertake sexual activities that require lots of time. Things like bondage, fisting and some other fetishes you will have seen described on this blog in some detail take planning, time and effort.

Don’t get me wrong – I love my sex life but I’m beginning to realise that perhaps I’ve never mastered the art and technique of the quickie.

I’ve had quick sessions before but I always sort of felt that they missed the point. Perhaps I’m missing the raw thrill of getting off and getting on with your day.

I’ve expressed my admiration for German sex parties before on this blog – the efficiency with which they set a start time so everyone is ready to play at once. You can have amazing sex in the time it takes to go to a movie.

I can see some advantages of the quickie. You have more time to sleep, shop, work or snuggle. You can have more of them. They require less planning and gear. It’s about cramming as much passion and hot sex into a small space of time.

Perhaps if I’d done more beats as a teenager (beats: slang for a public place where guys meet for sex, unlike the British term “cottaging” or the American term “cruising” we Aussies define it in terms of the place it happens. eg. “I went down to a beat today and fucked this hot eighteen year old boy wearing a school uniform while he sucked off a blond twink”)

On a related note, I probably should cut down on the amount of time I spend masturbating. Not the frequency, but I’ve never been the one to have a quick wank – I tend to draw it out. Something else to perfect.

So in conclusion, it might be time to experiment with sexuality at speed. I need a good term for it – perhaps express sex? fuck lite? And I figure that who else knows most about quick sex and a hurried wank than eighteen and nineteen year old guys? I’ll have to get them to give me some pointers.