Noé came for his second session and I really enjoyed it. He’s learning a lot. Still a long way to go, but he pays attention during his lessons and I think he will make a really a really incredible sub boy by the time his lessons with me come to an end. I took lots of photos of his second session but I thought that it might be worthwhile to first post his impression of the session before I post the pics. In Noé’s own words:
For someone with a sexual history such as mine, subbing can be really difficult. The trust it requires and the comfort can be incredibly difficult to come by, but I think daddy and I are working towards it.
Before I go on, let me share my history. I am a rape survivor, something that can be difficult to talk about, but is important to talk about. I was taken advantage of in the most colossal way. Literally. I was having a hookup instead of going to a super bowl party (since football is stupid) and when we started to fuck and the top was too big, I asked him to stop, he changed positions and kept going. This happened multiple times before I stopped fighting.
This makes my descent into the world of bdsm a bit terrifying for me. I’m in a position where I’m so easy to take advantage of its hard not to think that it’s inevitable.
Yet it’s also liberating. By entering the bdsm world, I liberate myself from the burden of control. By learning to let go, I learn to trust myself to make the right decisions. By freeing myself from the need to control everything, i find ways of freeing myself of the damage of my past.
I used to view myself as damaged goods, and view the damage as a large part of my reason for getting interested in being a submissive, but I realized that although I may get anxious sometimes, though the lack of control might be scary sometimes, me getting into this world speaks to my strength.
I am strong enough to choose submission when I’ve had it chosen for me in the past, but more importantly I’m strong enough to recognize that one person doing that to me shouldn’t make me trust nobody. There are good people in this world. People like daddy who just want to open me up to new things and educate me. People who aren’t looking to damage me.
Yesterday, daddy and I had a session that really helped me with this point of view, generally it really helped me let go.
When I first got there, we cuddled and chatted and I sucked his cock some, he also put on a scrotum stretcher, which I was not a fan of. Then he pulled out his blindfold, blindfolded me and stood me up. I was really nervous. I was in daddy’s apartment, with my balls practically in a vice (a weird sensation to say the least), blinded, and I had no idea what was about to happen. Then I felt it, rope, I felt daddy’s hands weaving through my underarms, around my chest and back as he laid out a latticework rope harness. During this I felt his hands tugging on the rope to make sure it was tight etc, and then I hear him say that he’s gonna put on a hood so he can take photos. This makes me think that he’s done with the rope and he’s decided to spare me the full restraint, a short lived idea, after some photos, he puts me in position on his bed, lying on my back with my knees bent and my feet on the bed, and he starts tying up my legs. I suppose I’m not being spared heheh. I feel my legs get fastened in place. Loving the sensation of losing my ability to move at all. After this he shot me playing with myself a bit and then decided to restrain my arms too.
Now I was completely at his mercy and I loved it. Here he removed the hood, but left me blindfolded and he moved me to suck his cock.
After this came the really interesting part. Daddy told me he wanted to time me to see how long it would take me to get out of the rope, he set his timer and relaxed since he loves watching me struggle. He told me it was a pretty easy tie, but it’s something I’ve never experienced (being tied up). It took me about 13 minutes to get out and when I was done, I went in to suck daddy’s cock which he had instructed me to do.
Daddy had to go to his computer to buy plane tickets, so I crawled over, following him. But under his desk I couldn’t suck him. The height of the desk was wrong so I played with daddy’s balls. Then he instructed me to crawl around to his cock so that I could suck him, which I did.
When he was done, he told me to crawl back to the bed, and from here he started to prepare to open me up. He put me in what seemed like a portable sling on his bed and started to cover my ass in his magic combo of lube and crisco. First he told me that we were going to find my prostate, which he had an easy time doing. He massaged it which was the most intense feeling ever (or at least up there) and he’d have me count down during prostate massages before starting to put his hand in. Daddy was cruel though. He told me he was putting two fingers in when he had put in all 5. That said I was able to take it and I was able to take most of his hand. Here and there he’d have me fumble my hands over to find poppers and taught me I should always offer them before sniffing some myself. The poppers really helped me relax and take daddy’s hands. He used his steel plug with ball bearings, which caused my ass to tighten up a bit due to the cold of the steel, and then massaging my prostate and more poppers calmed my ass down again. By the end of stretching he was able to get in the entire steel plug which is quite a large plug. Once daddy was done stretching me, he fucked me. I’ve heard that daddy’s cock is a monster but after our stretching it basically slid right in.
Daddy was an amazing fuck. He knew exactly what he was doing with his cock and it felt fantastic. It was also a great way to cap off a session filled with tons of learning about myself and my own ability and desire to make daddy happy.
For me it’s interesting what he left out of his write up – he didn’t mention the flogging or the throat fucking. 🙂